It’s that time of year when we start thinking about organising a Christmas meal out for the Sisterhood but this year we decided that we really deserved a proper treat after spending the last few months trekking around Essex eating cake (it’s hard work, really). We thought that a Spa Day was in order and, after googling thoroughly and finding some shockingly poor value deals (£79 for use of the facilities and a buffet lunch at some places – all treatments extra!) I suggested Prested Hall where I had been several years ago and spent a relaxing day with my sister before her wedding. It’s a brilliant deal in comparison to any others I could find – £75 for a full day (Saturday 9.30-5.30) including two 30 minute treatments; full use of the pool, sauna, steam room and gym (as if!); a welcome drink and cookie on arrival and either afternoon tea or a two-course lunch in their Bistro.
As much as we love our children, the thought of a whole child-free day to ourselves, chatting, relaxing, being pampered and eating was a truly rare and exciting prospect and the race to be ‘spa ready’ commenced. Decisions, decisions: one-pieces or tankinis? (the word ‘bikini’ never surfaced, thank heavens) to wax or to shave? The use of a hedge trimmer was briefly mentioned ….
And so, to the day itself and our critique of the venue:
The Spa was lovely and tranquil and the treatments were absolutely divine – we all opted for facials and back, neck and shoulder massages – Sister X actually fell asleep in the Relaxation Room after her facial! The only criticism of the Spa would be that they have a little seating area where you can help yourself to herbal teas but there are no magazines or anything to read in it, apart from the Spa Treatment Menu which took me all of two minutes to thumb through. One Health Club member actually commented that she had never seen anyone else using the area – perhaps that is why!
The pool, sauna and steam room were as you would expect and we enjoyed paddling around lazily with woggles until our fingers were wrinkly. The Sun Room, however, looked like it had been decorated by a 7 year old (in fact, I think my 7 year old could have done a better job) as the paint work was pretty shabby which detracted somewhat from the care and attention given to the décor in the Spa itself. It could also do with some new magazines and a bit more variety – my dentist has a better selection, to be honest. The changing rooms were fine but the showers, again, could do with a bit of tlc – a few mouldy, cracked tiles just spoiled that feeling of luxury pampering.
Obviously, being the expert cake critics that we are, we went for the afternoon tea food option. Now I may be fussy but I cannot stomach egg mayonnaise or smoked salmon, which seem to be staple fillings for unimaginative afternoon tea providers county wide. I know, I know, millions of people love both but, what can I say? Not my bag (Sister Y doesn’t like egg either – just saying). However, I had checked the ‘current’ menu on the website and no mention was made of either so I thought I was safe. Imagine my dismay, then, when we sat down to indulge in our decadent sandwiches only to be confronted with smoked salmon and, you guessed it, smelly old egg mayonnaise! Bearing in mind that I have quite severe baby brain and cannot rely on much of the information in it at present, I thought it possible I had just made up alternative fillings to satisfy myself. However, since returning home, I have indeed checked the website and the sandwiches should have been: mozzarella, plum tomato & pesto; chicken mayonnaise with salad; prawn & marie rose sauce and cucumber with cream cheese. So my post-natal brain was not playing tricks on me.
Disappointing sandwiches aside (not to labour the point but they were actually starting to go stale too, so had obviously been made quite some time in advance) I’m afraid the rest of the afternoon tea didn’t really come up to scratch. We were told that the scones were ‘still warm from the oven’. They weren’t. Mine was actually still slightly frozen in the middle so clearly not freshly baked as it states on the menu (I just checked) and definitely not warm. This, I did point out to the waitress who apologised but clearly didn’t really care. The cakes did look very pretty and there was a good selection – mini choux bun, lemon tart and chocolate layer cake to name a few but by that point I had the hump a bit and couldn’t be placated with delicious petit fours! So, in a nutshell, we would not recommend the afternoon tea (well, Sister X might as she has issues with ‘telling it how it is’ – her own words – she is too pleasant for her own good. On the other hand, perhaps I’m just narky and hard to please!)
In summary then we would give Prested Hall 5/5 for the Spa treatments, 3/5 for facilities and 3/5 for food. On the whole though, we would say that the day was excellent value for money.
The Sisterhood of the Long Boobs 